Ouch he took it badly

It was a third date, a date where he suggested the meeting place. So I was surprised when I got a phone call that he was lost. I did my best with the directions and walked out to the highstreet to see if I could spot him.  I did spot him eventually after 2 more calls.(Giving directions is not a strong point of mine). He went to park and I said I’ll go to the box office and get I’ll tickets.

I was already unsure of this guy as he was about to embark on another degree after completing one and quitting another. I’d summed him up as one of lifes’ drifters, living back home with mum and still no idea what he wants from life.

So getting lost to somewhere he’d suggested not saying thanks or offering to pay for his ticket I purchased we’re just other things bothering me about him.

But afterwards in the bar we chatted and once his shyness disappears he’s lovely. So I thought!

I decided to end things at the end of the evening I knew this guy wasn’t for me. I let him down gently starting with a few compliments and basically telling him the truth. That I’m older looking to settle down, know what I want in life, and I didn’t think he did. Apart from a brief arkwardness I thought things went ok. We had liittle joke, hugged went our separate ways.

Next morning I got a text “Thank you for making me feel like a right tool last night.”

I replied “Sorry sounds like I’ve upset you, that wasn’t my intention.”

“What were your intentions?”

So again I explained why.

His reply “For the record, I’m not that upset – I just feel like you’ve completely wasted my time and am at a loss to decide what you’ve gotten out of it. If your not interested you shouldn’t go out on a second date yet alone a third because you’re just leading someone on.”

Is 3 dates really wasting a persons’ time? 3 years maybe!

Tall, dark, handsome (ish)

The weather was gloomy, I stood on the train platform and was relieved when the two drunken blokes got on the train going the other way. As I got on the train going across town, I thought ‘ok this date better be worth meeting’, and that it best not start raining, I don’t want to turn up looking like a frizzy haired drowned rat.

I arrived first but I was early and it was a lovely pub so I didn’t mind.  I got approached by a tall dark haired man, with the most sexiest eyes. Oh what a nice surprise, he isn’t too bad looking, slightly on the thin side and a couple of teeth that looked scary, but generally handsome. Apart from I noticed on one hand he had long nails, ok he’s a music teacher and teaches guitar. Though creepy a man with long finger nails, yikes!

Quiet, he was very quiet in the way he spoke, his mannerisms; and bless him when he approached us he apologised as he was nervous and is a shy person.
Though lovely, he did open up and chat and those eyes when he smiled

He wasn’t drinking as driving, me I was knocking them back and hence I was in full on flirt mood. To the point where I came out and told him how goddamn sexy his eyes were. He blushed and laughed, he actually blushed and laughed a lot as I recalled, maybe I shouldn’t have drunk so much.

Though he’s been in touch today and we’re going on another date, this time in his town and a pub I last went to 3 years ago surprisedly on a date. So he can drink this time and I’ll be the sober one. Will I still think he’s a bit of alright or was I wearing my alcoholic glasses, will soon find out…..

Online dating

Ok I’ve been on dating site POF for a while and surprisedly have had a few dates. But recently seeing the same old profiles appearing in my search, and well there’s not much on offer which isn’t after a one night thing, or whoms conversation skills are ‘you look sexy!’
So I had an offer emailed through for match and thought yep I’ll sign up. I so wish I hadn’t, the choice on their site is worse than POF, have spent the last 40 minutes searching and not found one profile I like. The TV adverts show young 20 year olds flirting on the train station platform. The reality is divorces in their late 40s. 
Oh well I’m on there for the next 6 months, will be shocked if I go on one date from the site. 

One night!

Just been out on a CS drinking social.
Met a new lady to CS, Vicky. She messaged me beforehand as was nervous about turning up early, and being the only female. I gave her my number and told her you can’t miss me I’m 6ft, but to call if she couldn’t locate us. What was lovely is she told me I looked friendly and approachable in my profile shot, awww…sweet!!!
She found me at the bar and was telling me she’d just come out of a 20 year relationship. I introduced her to the gang out that night, and she got chatting to some fellas. The more she drank, the friendlier she was getting to one of the blokes, who like her is relatively new to CS.  She got to the point of not walking straight. I thought okay she’s obviously on a mission. Though being new to CS  she might regret her actions tomorrow, and not want to go out on another social. It concerned me that the bloke was relatively sober and Vikki wasn’t.
Apart from her there was only me and Sarah out female wise. Sarah took control and cornered her to check she was ok and knew what she was doing.  I suppose that is all we co do, and so her and said bloke were first to leave.

The next morning surprisedly early, Vicky texted us to say she had enjoyed the evening and whether I was out that night with CS. I think Vicky is on a mission to have some fun after her break up with her ex. Havn’t we all been there in some point in our lives!! Funnily though on meeting her first impressions is she appeared slightly bookish, I wasn’t expecting a party animal to appear!!

Then there was Sarah & Paul. I’ve never met Paul, before, Sarah oviously had they we’re 2 peas in a pod, laughing and gabbing away. When I asked her so you and Paul, her response was no way. Why I enquired. Her response, ‘because he’s older than me’. Three whole years shes 39, hes 42, big deal!! They are so made for each other. I left before them and texted her to go make a move. I doubt she will, it’s so annoying to see two people who are perfect for each other but neither willing to take that next crucial step. Plus both of them are truely lovely and I know would make a great couple.

I’ve just finished reading this book ‘One day’, we’re a couple take 20 years to finally get it on. Ok sometimes you need to grow as a person, everyone’s journey is different. But Sarah and Paul aren’t 20 year olds, they don’t want to be taking out their pension and finally getting it on. Ooo no!!

That brings us to Tom33, the host that evening. Me and him we’re the youngsters out, and so spent a lot of time chatting to each other. He actually ended up using me as a scapegoat. Sarah, Paul and Steve were heading onto another bar to meet some other CS people. What I didn’t know was Tom had texted them to say he was walking me home. Thanks Tom they now all think something went on between us, great!! Tom came clean and messaged me the next day and ended his message with ‘ so if you fancy meeting up for a coffee just let us know.’
Let me tell you about Tom… He joint CS not long after me, we’ve met a number of times on CS, the last CS I saw him on, it looked like he was with someone. Plus I know he’s had a date with one of the other girls. It’s like he’s overlooked us for a few months and now thought what the hell I’ll ask her out. The funny thing is if he’d asked me out earlier I would’ve said yes. Now well he’s a mate I’ve done the got to know you and yes he’s easy to chat to. But I don’t think we have any chemistry between us, well a little but not huge sparks a-go-go! Not a Sarah & Paul!
I politely ignored his coffee invite, by saying ‘hang on mate have you not forgotten we’re both out on a CS social on Wednesday.’ It gives me more scope to decide whether I should meet him for that coffee or not. I don’t want to ruin the friendship, and there’s the small issue of not fancying him. I’ve tried dating blokes I like but don’t fancy before with no success. So that’s my dilema! Though it was a fine night out!

You’d thought when you hit your 30s you’d know if a guy likes you…

…though still I’ve no idea.

Back in January I got an invite for a weekend away caving by a best friend to celebrate her boyfriends’ 30th birthday. At said party I got very drunk as one does, and well if there wasn’t video evidence I wouldn’t have believed my actions. I’m too mortified to say, but there was a guy involved, nothing rude or sexual we we’re just chatting, but it’s the drunkenous, lets say racist slur that was coming out of my mouth. I was ashamed at how I acted, luckily said guy and his mates thought it was hirlarious.

A month or so later my friend and her boyfriend had said they’d gone out with this guy, and he asked if I was coming out. According to my friend this guy liked us though thought I wouldn’t like him as he wasn’t tall enough for us. Me being 6ft I’m use to being the taller one in a couple, so I’ve no problem!

Roll on 2 more months, Thursday night I met my best mate for a quick drink after my uni course, even though I have a terrible cold at the moment. Said guy was there, ok he’s lovely and very easy to flirt with, but I noticed he was like that with everyone, not just me.

I think what actually happened before was my friend was thinking I could match make here, and asked him what he thought of us. He no doubt said nice, but too tall for us.

I only stayed out for an hour that night. So yesterday I facebooked a couple of people out that night including said guy to apologise that I wasn’t up for partying and hoped all had a good night. My thinking is, if he likes us I’d hear back from him.

The caving by the way was fantastic, the nooks and small holes I got myself through I was impressed with myself. Especially as this is a girl who gets claustrophobic in a lift!

Attraction

Well I just had my first message on an online dating site from a woman. I opened it thinking it was one of these, we are arranging a dating event messages. Instead I had a message saying lovely pics. Plus the lady messaging me was a very attractive woman, so I do feel flattered. If I was standing next to her in a bar, she’d be tough competition (if she was straight that is). Though unfortunately for her I’m not bi in the slightest. 

Also lately I’ve got a thing for corny, patronizing lines. For example when I went to pick my car up from the garage. A tall, strapping man, maybe 10 years my senior, ( the type that looked like he could handle himself in a fight); handed my keys to me, gave us a wink and said ‘alright darling!’ My heart surprised me with a flutter and my thoughts we’re ‘mister you can wink at me anytime!’

Chit chat with the boys

Tuesday night I went out for a few quiet drinks on a CS newbie social. A group of about a dozen people turned up, a few people I had met on previous CS social nights out, the rest all new faces.

I ended up down the end of the table chatting to the lads, and how refreshing was it. All my friends and colleagues are mainly female and the talk tends to be men, scandalous gossip and bitching. Nothing wrong with that, but being the only female in male company means you can harmlessly flirt, and tend to be the centre of attention. I admit the men were a far cry from Brad Pitt material, but its nice to grab attention when you can!

Vincent 23 ( yep CS tend to know everyone by first name and age as thats your profile title) is very geeky IT graduate, who talks like he has swallowed a dictionary, but I got to give it to the guy he has a sense of humour. And me being just over 10 years his senior, can get away with saying he’s a sweet guy, lovely! But also I discovered after I persuaded him to remove his glasses, he has the Clark Kent thing going on. What an amazing pair of mickey blues! Though unfortunately I couldn’t persuaded him to try contacts.

I left the pub not having found my superman, but realising it can be super fun to chat to lads without them or you having a hidden agenda.

Dentists

A conversation with parents the other day…
Me ‘I need a new dentist it’s been 2 years and I all I hear is nightmare stories about the local dentists.’
Mum ‘Oh i just joint the practice where your dad goes.’
Dad ‘Yeah they’re very good and are a reasonable price. Ask for Mr Lesti’
Mum ‘Oh yes he is a good dentist, young to, hey he might be single, dentist earn good money’.

So I rang and joint the practice, and on Thursday I had an appointment with Mr Lesti.
He was tall, blue eyed, looked about my age. But oh so serious, and the accent it was Russian or Eastern european. It actually made me feel a bit nervous, it was like having orders barked at you and then to see what could be instruments of torture enter your mouth. Worrying!
I made the effort to make small talk and made a joke, that went straight over his serious head. But I did notice as I was exiting the room, a quick up down once over look from him. Was he checking me out, or maybe thinking geez what a tall lady!

I then did something I was mortified with. I walked past reception, waving to the receptionist on the phone, got in the car drove to work. Half way on the journey I realised I didn’t pay, what must the receptionist and staff think of me. It was 30 mins later when I arrived at work I quickly rang and paid on phone, being really apologetic. My brain was obviously thinking about whether the dentist was hot or not!

Springtime lets fall in …

I’ve a touch of the green eyed monster. Lately all my single friends (and I mean all, I’m the last single girl standing I thinks) have have been dating and falling for someone. I’m happy for them and it’s lovely to hear about their successful lovey dovey dates. But there reaches a point when its like ok lets change the topic, some of us are still single with no dates in the pipeline. I’ve been doing internet dating, going out meeting new people with city social, and have nothing to show. Whereas my friend Em got set up by a work colleague to a 6ft 4 fireman. Yes I’m jealous being 6ft myself its so hard to find a man taller than me, and he’s a fireman! Why don’t I have work colleagues with such contacts! Then my friend at work has found love through facebook, a friend of a ex of her’s from 10 years ago messaged her. It’s now bloomed into ice-skating treats with the kids and sleepovers, she’s coming into the office with a smile of a cheshire cat. Whereas my other friend is seeing a bloke who ok I think sounds weird, but she’s gaga over.

Obviously its Springtime and love is in the air, can some of those lovey dovey vibes find an airstream to me, please!

On a separate note watched the film Adjustment Bureau today. If fate is really being controlled by men in hats who want to split people up who are strongly attracted to one another. Then fate I’m no longer a fan!

My Action Man date

I’d agreed to a date with a bloke off a certain site! He’s in the army and into his adrenaline fuelled sports, and after my caving experience the other weekend I thought why not date an action man (though I hasten to add I ain’t no Cindy!)

From online messages, it went to text messaging. Ok I thought what’s happened to this guys spelling, and actual basic structure of sentences. Fryday for instant, ok it could be a day of eatting nothing but fried food (that would be yummy!)

So I suddenly was not looking forward to this date at all; I mean if there’s only wool between the ears what are we going to talk about (I know cruel thinking!). It was arranged to meet Saturday lunchtime. My thinking was if the date’s bad well there’s always post date shopping to cheer us up.

Saturday arrived my phone was on the blink so I assumed things were still going ahead as planned. I arrived at the train station suddenly thinking ok am I going to spot this guy. Clearly I didn’t as I’d walked straight by the poor guy. He followed me and stood behind me whilst I fiddled with my phone. I then turned around to see this bloke give me a curious look. Ok that’s my date, nothing like the photos online, they we’re definitely his best shots. No he wasn’t ugly just not what I expected.

The accent ok that wasn’t local, turned out he’s originally from South Africa. Which might explain the weird name. I won’t type it because if you googled it I’m sure there’s only one or two people who could have such a name. This is a four word name that sounds like it should be up in lights. I told him this, that he could become a famous stuntman in Hollywood.

The date was actually ok. He paid for food and drinks, which is a rare thing I always offer to go dutch and he’s the first guy in ages to insist on paying. We walked around town, I dragged him into a few shops and he didn’t complain. I know that was wrong of me, but the window displays and Sale signs were hard to resist!

As we parted goodbye, we hugged (he nearly crushed my ribs) and he said he’d had a lovely time, and would like to see us again.

I got home, fixed my phone and replied to the message he’d sent before we’d met up. He replied to say he thought I was super sexy, and lovely to chat too. I replied thanking him for the compliment, then he replied with this ‘LOL yea should of! Well Nat when you are lonly and need sum company give us a shout would ya’  WHAT??!! Is he asking me to booty call him?

So I didn’t respond and that was 4 days ago, shame because if he’d asked us out nicely for a second date I would have loved to.